Life is filled with questions. One of the most pressing questions is why do bad things happen to good people? Why is it that seemingly good people at times cannot catch a break? Why do hurricanes, flooding and wild fires cause so much damage? Why do children die? Why do car wrecks, cancer, murder, famine and a million other unexplainable and horrific things happen?
Humans have a deep desire to want to blame unfortunate situations on someone or something. I think in part, because if something can be explained in some way there is hope it can be prevented from happening to them. Blame often gives a false sense of control over situations.
People, both religious and not, tend to throw a lot of blame at God. God caused this to happen. God allowed this to happen. God could have stopped this from happening. God could fix this if He just would. God this. God that. Truthfully, from time to time I have found myself searching for answers in difficult times and yes at times, I have tried throwing God under the bus.
My family and I have had more than our share of bumpy roads and curve balls over the past six years. We have had 2 cancer diagnosis; 16 surgeries, with number 17 right around the corner; radiation; chemotherapy; 4 family members die; 3 friends die; 2 pets die; 1 pet killed; 1 chronically ill pet; we have been significantly betrayed on two different occasions by people we deeply trusted; totaled a vehicle; moved twice; been unemployed; experienced family estrangement, had two different family members move in and live with us; had a vehicle broken into; had $8,000 stolen; been falsely accused and had our character attacked; and battled suicide. During this time period, we have had some people come right out and ask, and I am sure even more think, what my family is doing wrong that would put us in a place to experience all these stressors and losses.
I think consideration should be given to re-writing the narrative of the question. As humans we often ask “why me” … when difficult, heartbreaking things happen in our lives. When the question should be what is so extraordinary about me that I should be exempt from these things? Or in essence, “why not me”.
The truth is bad things, sad things, hurtful things, happen to people because life is messy, life is hard and life is often unfair. Generally speaking, bad things do not befall people because they are doing something wrong. Nor is God sitting in heaven zapping people with tragedy because He is disappointed in them or trying to get their attention.
It has been my experience, tragedies rarely have any explanation, much less a reasonable one. Why does one person survive cancer while another does not; why does one child die while another thrives; why does one marriage survive while another couple divorces; why can one couple readily get pregnant and another struggles with infertility; why are some families estranged and others are not? The questions are infinite and the answers are elusive.
One of the hardest things in life is desperately wanting answers when there are none. Sometimes, I believe the best we can do is try to find meaning in or lessons through the heartache.
Well said, very well said
You are so loved.